Neighbors

Back in the days when we had decided to shack up (live in sin) Mr. G had tried to get a transfer down to the coast so I would not have to relocate my business. After a year of trying it was decided I would move to central oregon. Soon Mr. G's house started to grow small... daily, and we only had 3 little monsters back then. So we found the new house (another story, another time) and the one thing we both really liked was the next door neighbor had a really cute yard with lots of flowers and veggies growing. I knew that meant real soil and a future garden... very rare in central oregon. Most folks grow rocks & sagebrush around here. But it was a cute place and she was a nice gal so we knew it would work, here is her garden then...

Then Maggie moved away and first rented her house out... but then she sold it.

The new people had 5or 6 kids, they were very religous (think gay hating biggots). One day soon after they moved in the head sow made a statement that their old neighbors were very happy they had moved away as they did not like the smells. At the time I thought that was a very strange thing to say to a new neighbor and I even asked Mr. G what that could mean... it did not sound good...

Turkeys smell, and when there are more then a dozen turkeys all pended up in a tiny pen they stink really bad. We soon found out what the head sow meant... the nice yard had changed also...

Then the shit hit the fan... Mr. G yelled at their kids one evening to keep it quiet, there are times when Mr. G has to get up before the crack of dawn to go to work. Soon the sow was on our front porch accusing a sleepy Mr. G of being a child stalking pediphile and everyone knows that gay guys do this... I came out on the porch and told the sleepy Mr. G to let me handle this...

I then proceeded to tell this white trash, stained sweats wearing, strongly smelling extremly fat sow what I thought of their "lifestyle". I then (after she told me we were damned to hell for eternity) told her that the only thing they had brought to our neighborhood since moving in was a decline in property values besides the stench from their house. She at that point started yelling (on our porch mind you) that we were after her children and she was putting a stop to it NOW. At that point I really lost my (well groomed) cool and told her to get her cock sucking mother fucking white trash ass off our property before I threw her mother fucking morman ass out in the street (see I did need that disclaimer on the top).

Soon the police were at our house, they visited for over 2 hours. The child stalking pediphiles had threatened the lives of the kind hearted christian neighbors who had done nothing wrong. The kind hearted christian neighbors were so threatened the called 911 3 different times before the police came. I no longer like the kind hearted white trash neighbors, they have since been nicknamed "the mother fucking mormans" and are still called that 1 year latter.

Mr. G now talks with them, he says we should put the past behind us... I remind him still about my family & the civil war... I will never forget. I have never had to entertain officers of the law at home before, it is not pleasant. I also find it surprising that the kind hearted God loving neighbors let their children play in our yard whenever we are not home. After what they told the police I would think they would warn their children away from the child stalking gay pediphiles... huh... go figure.

Now you've learned something new today!